GLOBAL IDENTITY SWAP OFFICE

Loontown is heading ways.
From the Beetle Gazette.

What if a citizen from one country could swap places (mutual consent) with a citizen of another country? What if you could choose between swapping identities with someone from another country or have them legally swap their social security numbers? The new "Global Identity Swap Office" (GISO) in Loontown is giving you a choice.

"Sure it sounds like the invention of yet another awkward reality TV show", Loontown´s Mayor Franklin Upward admits. "But what we have here is a tribute to modern life. Everyone wants to come to Loontown these days and we are willing to accept new faces more smug than us. But in order to regulate our limited regional space we need to rid ourselves of as many old crickets as we get new ones." Hinkel Doorden from the GISO agency explains the elegant simplicity of the swapping procedure. "First you place your ad and preferred swap country and even preferred time limit with us and wait with what matches we come up. If you already have a potential swap partner from abroad you bring in both party´s identities and wait for a go from us. The "True Willingness Detector" will than trace your determination and if you pass that test next thing you know you have a new identity."

Within five hours of its opening the office already is Loontown´s busiest hot spot agency. Beetles are squished into long lines. What makes this new offer so attractive, we ask Joseph Boredom Jr., the town´s wealthiest nest builder. He explains that however much independently you grow up, society has built a frame of definition around you that makes it difficult for personal change. "I have long accepted that people take me for a reliable nest builder unable to hold a tune. But frankly, I want to start anew, I want to sing. You may believe I am a sturdy dung beetle good with wood, but inside I am all cicada!"

"It is an interesting experiment", Mayor Franklin Upward says. "And we don´t even need to change our immigration law."

GISO is only the latest installation in a series of new and exiting bureaucratic establishments. When asked what is next on his agenda the Mayor twinkles with delight:"Well, why", he says. "It is of course the TICA (TERMINAL IDENTITY CHANGE AGENCY). We are looking to extinct the fruit flies!"